Your Wedding Guest List
How to build the list, decide who makes the cut without the drama, and track every RSVP in one place — free.
Build My Guest ListThe guest list is the single most emotional part of wedding planning — and the one that drives your budget, since nearly every cost scales per head. The trick is to decide the rules first and the names second. Set a cap, let everyone draft freely, then cut against clear tiers instead of arguing over individuals.
How to make your guest list
- 1
Set a headcount cap first
Your venue capacity and your per-guest budget set the ceiling. Agree on a maximum number before anyone starts adding names, so the list has a target to fit inside.
- 2
Both sides draft freely
Have each partner — and each set of parents, if they are contributing — write their own wish list. Do not edit yet. You need to see the full picture before you cut.
- 3
Combine and tier the list
Merge every name, then sort into tiers: must-invite, want-to-invite, and would-be-nice. The tiers are what you cut against when the total runs over.
- 4
Cut from the bottom up
If the combined list is over your cap, trim the lowest tier first using a clear rule everyone agrees to (see below), rather than arguing name by name.
- 5
Collect addresses and lock the count
Gather mailing addresses as you finalize names, send invitations about eight weeks out, then track RSVPs and give your caterer the final headcount.
Who to invite — and how to cut when you are over
When the combined list runs past your cap, decide by rule, not by name. Agree on these up front and apply them to everyone equally.
The "have we spoken in a year?" test
If neither of you has talked to them in the last year, they move to the B-list. This alone usually trims a list faster than any other rule.
Draw one clear line on kids
Adults-only, immediate-family kids only, or all kids welcome — pick one and apply it to everyone. Exceptions are where hurt feelings start.
Plus-ones by a consistent rule
A common one: married, engaged, or living-together partners get a plus-one; casual dates do not. Whatever you choose, apply it evenly across the list.
Skip the obligation invites
You do not owe an invite to coworkers, your parents’ friends you have never met, or someone just because they invited you to their wedding years ago.
Use a B-list, carefully
It is fine to send a second round of invitations as regrets come in — just send save-the-dates and invites to the B-list early enough that the timing never gives it away.
Track the whole list in VowSpace — free
A guest list is really three lists in one — who is invited, who has replied, and what they are eating. VowSpace keeps all three in sync so you always know your real headcount before the caterer asks for it.
- Group guests into households and manage plus-ones
- Collect RSVPs online with meal choices
- See your live headcount and who still owes a reply
- Build your seating chart from the same list
Wedding guest list questions
How do I make a wedding guest list?
Start with a headcount cap set by your venue and budget. Have both partners (and any contributing parents) draft names freely, combine everything, then sort into tiers — must-invite, want-to-invite, would-be-nice. Cut from the lowest tier until you fit your cap.
How many guests should I invite to my wedding?
It is driven by your venue capacity and budget more than any rule — most weddings land somewhere between 75 and 150 guests. Because roughly 10 to 20 percent of invitees typically decline, you can invite a little over your target headcount.
How do I cut down a guest list that is too big?
Use consistent rules instead of debating each name: drop anyone you have not spoken to in a year, set one clear policy on kids, apply plus-ones evenly, and skip obligation invites. Cutting by rule keeps it fair and takes the emotion out of it.
Do I have to give every guest a plus-one?
No. A widely used approach is to give plus-ones to married, engaged, or cohabiting partners, and to members of the wedding party, while single guests who will know others there do not automatically get one. The key is applying whatever rule you pick consistently.
What is a wedding B-list?
A second tier of guests you invite as declines come in from your first round. It works only if you send the B-list their save-the-dates and invitations early enough that the staggered timing is never obvious.
Can VowSpace track my guest list and RSVPs?
Yes. Build your guest list, group households and plus-ones, collect RSVPs online, and see your live headcount and meal choices in one place, shared with your partner — free, with no credit card.